Quiet Please! The Guv'ner Is Working

Despite the fact The Überlord is out of the office, and in fact, out of the country until tomorrow (cue Hallelujah Chorus), I have spent all this morning working. Yes, you heard me correctly. Working. When I could have been blogging. Or reading gossip sites. Or napping on the couch in the Überlord’s office. Or procrastinating and drinking Diet Pepsi. Or making voodoo dolls in his likeness out of office supplies and then castrating them. With a rusty butter knife.

So yes, I worked. Of my own free will. Aren’t you all so proud? I’m putting it in the calendar as a reminder and next year I will bake a cake for the anniversary and possibly commission a bill board in Times Square saying “What were YOU doing on February 7th, 2008? THE GUV’NER WAS WORKING!” and it will be as smug and sanctimonious as it sounds and feature a huge, scary photo of me grinning with spinach on my teeth and giving a cheesy thumbs up.

There has been some rampant compiling of lists for a start. Things are getting to the Code Red stage of hectic as regards travel and meetings for the next few months, and keeping track of the who the where the when is getting horrendous, as is keeping a record of what paperwork has been completed for each trip. It is quite frankly a major spear in the Guv’ner’s side. Therefore, my highly informative lists are very helpful in these matters and as only I see these lists, I can scribble snide little comments in the margins like “get authorization for first class to Australia, chaaa right!” and “who does he think he’s kidding?” and when he’s really pissing me off I can scrawl myself a note that says, “Überlord requests middle seat in coach next to very fat person who hates deodorant”, as well as draw crude sketches of the Dark Überlord swinging in a hang man’s noose or being eaten by a lion or sodomized by Shaquille O'Neal. So even work can be fun to an extent.

Naturally now I am over the lists and more interested in the Internetz and whether Britney’s driven off of a cliff yet, while naked, speaking like Dick Van Dyke and covered in lime jello, weave falling through the air like a giant, hairy spider.

(She hasn’t.)

There are, however, still 9 and a bit hours left in the day, so I wouldn't count her out just yet.